Is lived experience the ‘Golden Key’ to effective mentoring?

Is lived experience the ‘Golden Key’ to effective mentoring?

In the world of mentoring, especially when supporting young people who have faced significant challenges, culture isn’t just a buzzword — it’s everything. At Bespoke Mentoring, we’ve always believed that the heart of our organisation lies in the relationships we build. That’s why, from day one, we’ve focused on creating a culture that attracts and retains talented individuals who bring the right balance of professional qualifications and real lived experience.
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Recruiting isn’t simply about filling roles with the most impressive CVs. It’s about finding people who can truly connect with the young people we support. Qualifications provide essential frameworks — safeguarding knowledge, mentoring methodologies, trauma-informed practice, and professional boundaries. These are non-negotiable. But qualifications alone don’t always bridge the gap when a young person is sitting in front of you, carrying the weight of abandonment, system failure, or past mistakes.
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That’s where lived experience becomes transformative.
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We deliberately recruit care leavers and prison leavers into our mentoring and support teams. This isn’t tokenistic; it’s strategic and deeply intentional. These colleagues bring something qualifications can’t teach: authentic understanding. They’ve walked similar paths. They know what it feels like to have doors closed on them. They understand the distrust that can exist towards “professionals” and the systems that were supposed to help.
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The impact on our young people has been profound and genuinely moving to witness.
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When a mentor who has themselves left the care system sits with a young person who is struggling with the transition out of care, something powerful happens. The young person doesn’t feel judged or analysed — they feel seen. The same is true for those who have come through the criminal justice system. A prison leaver who has turned their life around can speak with credibility and hope about making better choices, navigating probation, rebuilding family relationships, or finding purpose through employment.
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I’ve watched barriers dissolve in real time. Young people who were previously disengaged or hostile in sessions open up because they sense “this person gets it.” Our retention rates with young people have improved, engagement levels are higher, and we’re seeing more successful outcomes in areas like stable housing, education, training, and employment. The relatability factor creates trust faster than any textbook technique ever could.
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Of course, this approach only works within the right culture.

We’ve worked hard to build an environment where:

• Lived experience is valued equally alongside formal qualifications
• Staff feel safe to share their stories where appropriate, without pressure
• Continuous professional development bridges any gaps in formal knowledge
• Peer support and supervision are strong enough to hold the emotional weight that comes with this work
• Success is measured not just by metrics, but by the quality of human connection

It hasn’t always been straightforward. We’ve had to challenge some traditional recruitment mindsets and invest in robust support structures. But the results speak for themselves. Our team is more diverse, more resilient, and more effective because of the balance we’ve struck.
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To other organisations working with vulnerable young people: don’t be afraid to prioritise lived experience alongside professional competence. When you create the culture that welcomes both, you don’t just recruit staff — you recruit hope, credibility, and genuine empathy.
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At Bespoke Mentoring, our mission has always been to provide mentoring that meets young people where they are. By building a team that reflects the journeys many of them are on, we’re better placed to walk alongside them with authenticity and purpose.
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The young people we support deserve mentors who don’t just understand the theory — they understand the reality. And in that space between qualifications and lived experience, real transformation becomes possible.
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If you’re a care leaver or prison leaver with a passion for supporting the next generation, we’d love to hear from you. The right culture starts with the right people.

Chris Powell, Founder, Bespoke Mentoring